Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I Had Really Hoped

Its been a long and emotional day that started with rain and a flat tire.  Thank-you again for your kind thoughts and prayers for Sandy. I had so hoped that the news would have been better for her.  Blood work that was done last week, showed significant changes in all the wrong places this week; her blood pressure was so low that the techs had problems drawing blood.  An x-ray taken showed a mass in her abdomen the size of a small cantaloupe and she was bleeding internally.  The kind thing to do, was to let her go.  Carl brought her home and spent the day with her.  I was at work hoping for a miracle.  

I'd hoped Sandy would be able to enjoy the warmth of the sun on our front porch.  I'd hoped she'd be able to enjoy the walks around our property and the chance to lay in the green grass.  I'd hoped to be able to take more pictures of her.  I'd hoped we'd have more time to get to know one another...But it was what I wanted, and not what was meant to be.  

We sat with Sandy as her sweet, quiet soul left this world for the next.  This evening after we left the vets office, we saw this rainbow.  
God speed Sandy.    
Even though we hardly knew you, we won't forget you. 

55 comments:

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

I think she's carried many a wish from 'us' to our Golden pals on the other side -

Sometimes things just arent how they should be -

I'm sure she'll spend tomorrow in the sun with visits from Lady and other furry special Golden Gals -

Great rainbow - the sign that all is good - make that GReat!

Parsley said...

I'm so sorry. :-(

Nancy K. said...

RIP beautiful Sandy.
Sending you hugs Kim...

Julie Harward said...

She won't forget you...and one day when we are in Heaven, It will be easy to find you, you will be the lady surrounded by many, many beautiful Goldens and I'll have a few too. :D

Kritter Keeper at Farm Tails said...

oh kim, i have been busy this week and didnt read the post yesterday but this is so sad. i hate cancer. i am so sorry but you made the right decision. i cannot imagine the pain she was in. poor little thing. at least she knew you though for a short time, she left this world knowing the love of a good human(s) thru you and carl. blessings and prayers to you my friend. hugs, kritter keeper

Anonymous said...

my hearfelt condolances. time is certainly not a measure of the strength or depth of a heartfelt connection. i'm sure sandy felt your love/care for her as much as you are feeling her loss. at least she felt cared for and loved at the end. thank you for doing that for her - and for all of us by extension.

Bobbi said...

I'm crying with you, Kim. So sorry. She's all better now. (((Hug))))

Sue said...

You saw the Rainbow Bridge. It must light up in welcome. I'm so sorry you didn't have more time with her, but she had people who cared with her at the end and that is so important.
Sue

Deb said...

I'm so sorry. It is so hard to lose a friend. Enjoy what memories you have of this wonderful dog. Hugs, Deb=^..^=x5 Canada

Channon said...

Thank you for sharing those last details. It's never easy, letting go...

Sandy sent you a rainbow! What a special touch.

texwisgirl said...

i just don't know how you can do this over and over again. you are their angel...

Carolyn said...

I'm so sorry. The sky sure put on a show for Sandy.

Godspeed.

Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

We're sorry we've been absent so long and missed the chance to wish Bubba well, and to send Sandy a virtual hug and our prayers. We're glad she spent her last days with people who have more love in their hearts than the people who could dump a sick, old dog rather than take care of her. Bless Sandy, and bless you.

Jed & Abby

Sherry Sutherby http://russ-stickacres.blogspot.com/ said...

As the owner of 22 sled dogs, with the average age of nine..., I feel your pain. Sandy had a beautiful look to her ~ her eyes just spoke to you. Over the years we have had dozens and dozens of dogs we have fostered and moved on to good homes, or kept to the end of their days on earth. I feel it is a privledge, one few people know, to be the caretaker of these fine animals through their aging years. My heart goes out to you...but what a wonderful gift for Sandy. God bless.

KT and Lady said...

We are so, so sorry about Sandy. That she could not enjoy more of the bountiful garden that is Golden Pines. I can assure all that her short time with you and Carl will never be forgotten by us mere mortals on earth or the commander of the Rainbow bridge (yea, the big guy). Another Golden star in the sky. The Rainbow says it all.

Charlie said...

Sometimes all you can do is be close and supportive, and that's a lot!
- Anne

Dog Blogging With Luna said...

Oh sweet Sandy! She left the rainbow for you. :) Sending hugs and kisses to you and your other furry babies!

Tweedles -- that's me said...

Kim
Sandy felt your love.

Oh how you had hoped and tried everything.
Now Sandy is in the arms of the angels, and being gently rocked.
The rainbow in the sky is a sign.
Grasp it, hold on to it.
Sandy is fine.
I wish I had words to tell you, that I know how you feel and we are so sorry
love
tweedles

Miriam said...

Oh, how heartbreaking. She deserved better of the humans in her life, and I am so glad you were able to come through for her at the very end. What a gift to her. I am so sad.

MAXMOM IN SA said...

Oh Kim...I'm so tearful here. You have to go through so much for these golden animals. Thank you again for being with them at their time of need. I am so sorry about Sandy's passing. At least you have the rainbow - her legacy for others.
Hugs to you and lotsaluv too.
MAXMOM IN SOUTH AFRICA

Sandra said...

God speed, sweet Sandy.

So so sorry for your loss. No matter how little time we have with an animal, it's really hard to let them go as the second we meet them, we fall in love completely and unconditionally...

Sandra said...

God speed, sweet Sandy.

So so sorry for your loss. No matter how little time we have with an animal, it's really hard to let them go as the second we meet them, we fall in love completely and unconditionally...

Sandra said...

God speed, sweet Sandy.

So so sorry for your loss. No matter how little time we have with an animal, it's really hard to let them go as the second we meet them, we fall in love completely and unconditionally...

Joanna said...

Dear Kim,

Sad but, after what you posted yesterday, inevitable news. Darling Sandy had simply had enough, but the love you showed her at the very end of her life will have helped her on her final journey.

The rainbow says it all, doesn't it?

xx

IsobelleGoLightly said...

What you do for these dogs is a very special gift. Thank you.

Lori Skoog said...

That rainbow had to be there for Sandy. I'm so glad you were part of her life.

LindaG said...

*hugs* ♥

MySpecialDoggies said...

We're so sorry for your loss - run free sweet Sandy... You were with her all the way.

Quiet woofs
Nadine & golden Neeli

Jacqueline said...

I don't know how you do this Kim...but God bless you for having the strength and courage.

The Rocky Creek Scotties said...

The promise of a rainbow - Sandy has already crossed and is telling Tanner and Cowboy and Java that all is well at Golden Pines.

xo
Lynn

KB said...

Oh so sad. I'm glad that Sandy knew your love for a few days but I'm so sorry that it wasn't longer. My heart goes out to you.

Tammy said...

So sorry....the rainbow was special.

Tammy

I need orange said...

Awwww.

I'm so sorry.

I lost one to hemangiosarcoma..........

sharing your sorrow, Vicki

Schnauzer Days said...

Oh dear, we checked in to see how Sandy was doing and are so sad to hear your news. You know you did the kindest thing for her in her final hours, run free at The Bridge Sandy , Dex & Lou xxx

Home In The Hollow said...

Kim, I was afraid of that when I read your post. However, if it's any consolation, please remember the following excerpt. It has helped me over the years. "...Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk often of me as if I were beside you...I loved you so...'twas Heaven here with you."...:)JP

Tina Eudora said...

There are no words Kim, but you know what is in my heart this morning. God bless your home this day!
Tina xo

Sheila and Bob said...

Run Free Sandy......
Kim, we know how hard this is and we don't know how you do it, but we are profoundly grateful that their are folks like you who give love and comfort to those who need it most.

Sheila & Bob

Doc said...

You and Carl are the angels in every dog owners hearts

ladyfi said...

Oh no. I'm so terribly terribly sorry for your loss. I know that dogs have a special place in heaven.

Smiffy said...

Awww, so sorry for you both. It was not meant to be was it Kim. At least she got the chance to meet you before she had to leave this world. Best wishes. Sue x x x

Sharon said...

I didn't see this post until just now. I was happy for the rainbow! It's a hard thing you do, fall in love and care for these beautiful old dogs and then have to let them go.

God Speed, Sandy!

bellaboo said...

It was meant to be that she came to you.She left this earth peacefully,knowing she was truly loved.Now her spirit can run free.

Amber-Mae said...

Poor girl. I think letting her go was the best thing to do too. Well, she is now free of pain. That rainbow is just beautiful! Maybe that was her just letting you know that she has arrived at the Rainbow Bridge. Who knows? RIP sweet sandy & hugs to you, Kim.

claudia said...

When life leaves us speechless, that rainbow says it all ...
Take care, kisses

Pamela said...

When life leaves us speechless, that rainbow says it all ...
Take care, kisses

Zona said...

My husband sent me a picture of that rainbow (or a similar one) from his office in Chantilly yesterday and I immediately wondered how you and Sandy were doing. Run free, sweet girl!

Toni aka irishlas said...

So sad. But, she had you and Carl at the end.

That rainbow was certainly a sign it was her time.

She is now running free without pain.

My thoughts are with you. I know how hard this is.

phylliso said...

I`m so sad for you.I don`t know how you keep doing what you do,but you & your husband sure are angels to these dogs.They certainly feel your love being by their side in their last hours & weeks of their lives.God bless you,phyllis

Jim said...

Sandy has returned 'home'.

Life At Cobble Hill Farm said...

I don't know how you do it. I'm so sorry. I have tears streaming down my face as I type.
Staci

Angus said...

Somethings are meant to be. . It was meant that you took Sandy early, it was meant that your doubts were dispelled, and it was meant that this kind old lady was wrapped in true love at the end.

bad penny said...

Sandy is running over thar rainbow to meet the others you have so lovingly cared for. I hope she finds Roxy my friend's young black lab who suddenly died last Friday

xx

Boondocks said...

Rest in peace, Sandy!

AROOOF!
Boondocks

Homer said...

We didn't expect this to happen. We left a comment a couple of days ago when she joined your family...

Our thoughts are with you.

Love,
Homer

Karine said...

Just back form vacation and catching up on your blog...I'm so sorry to read about your loss of Sandy. Even when a pet isn't with us for long, they leave such a mark on us that it is always heartbreaking to see them go. My thoughts and prayers are with you.