Friday, August 12, 2016

An Unexpected Good-Bye to Sheba

You might have noticed, it has been very quiet around here for more than a week. I would love to say that we have just been on a long needed vacation, but the reality is a bit different. And I'll just say that we've had what I think, are a few more than our share of curve-balls thrown at us.
The most recent one is Sheba.  I've been trying to write this very post since Monday.  But the words haven't come.  Perhaps because deep down inside I thought that if I wrote the words it would make what was happening so much more real.

But now I am faced with the sad reality that today brought the loss of our precious Sheba.  It began this past Sunday when she collapsed.  I found her laying in the grass. At first I thought she was just resting, so I took a few pictures as I walked over to her.  She was so perfectly still and her eyes were closed,.
Her gums were pale, and when Carl and I got her onto her feet after several minutes, she had "waste" all over her. We helped her back to the house where we gave her a quick bath.  After a couple of hours, she seemed brighter, and her gum-color had improved and she seemed fine. A blur of events would follow with a visit from Mobile Vet on Monday morning, who after taking several x-rays, sent us to see a veterinary cardiologist because Sheba's heart appeared to be enlarged. The EKG indicated what an ultrasound confirmed, and that was that Sheba had a tumor on her heart.  We were given the grim diagnosis of cardiac-hemangiosarcoma, or cancer of the heart. I was told Sheba could have hours, days, weeks, or maybe months, but not much more.  

I tried to remain optimistic, and it helped that by Tuesday Sheba was herself.  I'd started her on a herbal supplement called Yunnan Baiyao which is a hemostatic powdered medicine famous for being carried by the Vietcong to stop bleeding during the Vietnam War. It appeared to be helping because her gum/tongue color was good, and her appetite had returned.  She was tiring easier, but she was up and around and was happy.

Today began normally.  With the week we'd been having, I was looking forward to being home and relaxing.  I got the dogs out early, and Sheba was eager to play with a ball, and she rolled in the grass.
~Sheba rolling in the grass this morning~
I took a few pictures, and noticed how happy she seemed.  I ran a couple of short errands and came home, to let the dogs out for a 2nd walk before we settled in at home for the day.
~A Last Photo of Sheba this morning~
In the driveway Sheba came running towards me with the ball in her mouth, and suddenly collapsed in front of me. I knew what was happening, and did my best to calm her, and try and slow her breathing.  I gave her another herb called  'Bao Xian Zi'. that is dubbed the 'emergency', 'rescue', and 'insurance' pill to stop any hemorrhaging. But it didn't help. I'm not sure how much time passed, but finally her breathing slowed a little, and as she was able to look at me. In that moment, as hard as I was praying for more time and asking her not to go, I knew it was not to be. I also knew that if I waited, Sheba would leave this life on her own.  But I didn't want her to suffer any longer, so I called my (old) vets office, and said I was on my way with her. Shortly after 1 o'clock this afternoon, Sheba quietly and peacefully left us for the Rainbow Bridge.


Our nearly 11 years with Sheba passed much too quickly.  I was remembering this week why we adopted Sheba from the rescue all those years ago -- And it was because of Charlie.  He loved her.  We used to joke that Charlie thought we'd gotten her for him because they were instant and inseparable good friends.  Keeping her for Charlie may have been true at the time, but Sheba truly became a friend to all of us. Her unexpected loss leaves a hug gap in our lives that will never again be filled. Tonight as I write this, I have searched to find the words to say how much she'll be missed.  But there are no words.  Just the emptiness because she's gone.  

God speed to my beautiful canine sister, Sheba.  Missy, you were truly a once in a lifetime dog, friend and companion and we feel so lucky to have had you as part of our lives.  

45 comments:

  1. Oh! I'm crying as I write this. I'm so sorry.

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  2. Oh Kim, I'm so sad for you. You have such a big heart, and it breaks with sadness after giving Sheba such joy. Grieving with you.

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  3. I'm so sorry your family had to say goodbye to your sweet and beautiful Sheba. She had a wonderful life at Golden Pines with her large and very loving family.

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  4. So very sorry that the precious Sheba has left you, but what a wonderful life you gave her. Big hugs for poor Charlie - he will miss her as much as we will.

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  5. sweet, sweet girl! may she rest in peace. so glad she had good times all the way to the end.

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  6. Oh my, we are so sorry for your loss. Sheba was a beautiful girl inside and out.

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  7. Many tears of sadness are joining you during this time. Please accept our condolences for the loss of your beautiful girl Sheba. Hugs

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  8. We are crying tears right along with you, we are so vey sorry for your loss, she was a true angel indeed. stella rose and momma

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  9. OH my, I am so sorry about Sheba. I have tears in my eyes reading your post. She will be missed. It is great to see she was playing ball so near the end. Hugs to you and Charlie.

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  10. I am soooo very sorry, our furbabies leaving us to go to the Rainbow Bridge is so hard. Sending you lots of luffs and hugs, we will be thinking of you. Take care
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

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  11. *hugs* May God comfort you all on your loss. ♥

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  12. Dear, sweet, Sheba. So sorry for your loss ...

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  13. We lost our lifetimer in December 2014 (you know how Scotties can get into you). She wasn't enjoying life and probably never would again, you did the right thing. You had a great run with her, you couldn't save her from the bridge-it's not in your power. Hell, you can't even save yourself from that fate so celebrate her life, hug your pack and find another who NEEDS you.

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  14. We are so sad you had to say goodbye to your beloved Sheba. Sending you lots of pug hugs and prayers
    Love
    Mr Bailey, Hazel & Mabel

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  15. I am very happy that Sheba had you in her life and you had Sheba. She was loved and happy up till the end. My heart breaks for you. I am sending Prayers and Hugs. God Bless
    Bentley and Pat

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  16. Aww, I'm in tears, I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. I wish there was more I could say, but only time will help ease your heartbreak.

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  17. sheba.
    kim.
    charlie.
    i don't know what to say. tears.

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  18. We're so sorry. Hemangiosarcoma is too common in our breed, too. Now that my pups are getting on in age, I worry each time they act strangely. Last week we had a scare with Noah and it was the first thing to pop into my mind. Give Charlie a big hug from me. I'm sorry that he lost his best friend.

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  19. So sorry Kim. Sending white light and warm thoughts.

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  20. Kim, I'm so sorry. Sending lots of hugs and warm thoughts your way. You have a lots of wonderful memories to help you get through this.

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  21. Dear Kim, I'm crying for you as I read this~I'm so very sorry. I can relate because my daughter and her family have a Newfie Mix, age 14 and 120 lbs. He has been going downhill for months and they have finally decided that they need to let him go. Tomorrow is the day. He has been such a wonderful protector, standing between their young kids and snakes. A wonderful personality(I posted about him this week)and while it is time to set him free from the pain he is in, it is heartbreaking-even for me, because I bond so heavily with dogs. I'm going over tonight to say goodbye and take some photos of the family with him. I've prayed that he'd just go to sleep and not wake up, but they have a wonderful vet coming to their house to gently help him cross the bridge. Sending you lots of love.
    Noreen

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  22. I's so sorry to hear about your sweet Sheba. She sure was a special girl.

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  23. Farewell, sweet Sheba. We wish we could send more than hugs. We know she's left a huge hole in the family and especially Charlie.

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  24. The tears have no bounds. I am so sorry for your loss. You know we hold you, Sheba and your family in our hearts.

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  25. I'm so sorry for your loss. What a special girl. God speed.

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  26. I am so deeply, deeply sorry. My heart is just breaking for you. I don't even have the appropriate words. I am so deeply, deeply sorry. (((hugs)))) DakotasDen

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  27. So sorry for your great loss

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  28. Dearest Kim
    There really are no words that I can find to help you. The gap is too big, too deep, to painful,, and we know how you are hurting,
    You shared Sheba with us,, we thank you. You loved Sheba,, she thanks you. She would tell you so,, if she could.
    This is so heartbreaking. The cornerstone left for the Rainbow Bridge,, and you were with her,, in her final moments.
    We are soo sorry. We are crying with you
    love
    tweedles

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  29. Kim...these posts always get to me, but I have to say...I have learned so much from you about giving dogs a good life, no matter how long that is. There is no other place Sheba could have been that would compare with Golden Pines. I have the greatest respect for all that you and you husband do to give these sweet creatures so much. Very sorry for your loss. Thank you for being there.

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  30. We so wish we had know you years ago so we could have shared some of Sheba's life too. It is so easy to see how much she was loved. So very sorry for your loss. Mom used to think quick was better than prolonged, but she knows now that it is never easy. Soft woos and gentle hugs from all of us.

    Hugs and Woos - Ciara and Lightning and Mom too

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  31. Dear Kim - sending you hugs. We're so very sorry to read about your loss of Sheba - may her memories remain with you always.
    Quiet woofs,
    Nadine & Goldens Neeli & Elle.

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  32. As soon as I saw the word Sheba, I knew in my heart the news was bad. I am so very sorry your sweet girl is gone.

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  33. Sending hugs. And rottie kisses. (They are pretty comforting).

    -Lisa

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  34. Oh My ..... I am so sad for you!! Dear, dear Sheba ..... run free sweet girl. Sending hugs and love and whippie kisses. Like Rottie kisses, they too, are very comforting.

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  35. Letting them go when it's time is the right thing to do, so why does it feel SO bad? And it never gets easier, no matter how many times you have to do it. Sheba had a blessed life with you. Good on you for treating her like a queen. You did a wonderful thing for her.

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  36. Every loss is hard but I know that when it's a once in a lifetime dog it's like losing a part of you that you will never get back.
    My heart is breaking for you.
    I, along with so many others, sit here crying along with you over your great loss.
    I have no words to help but you know that she knew she was greatly loved and what better gift is there than that.
    XOXOXOXO

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  37. I'm very sad for your loss of darling Sheba. I can only imagine the mixture of hope and heartbreak this past week has been for you. God bless you for the wonderful life and love you gave to her.

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  38. My eyes are filled with tears over your loss of sweet Sheba. There are no words, except that you gave her all your love and she gave you hers. Hugs to you. It's so hard...

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  39. I read your today post and now this one.
    My heart breaks for you . . .
    There is no other love like this . . .
    My caring Kim . . .

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  40. We know exactly how you feel. Our Ellie died of the same condition. She had her physical the month before and seemed perfectly healthy in every way. She was absolutely fine until the moment she collapsed. So we had no diagnosis before we reached the emergency hospital where she died on the operating table.

    But this is not meant to be about Ellie. It is meant to let you know that I understand and mourn along with you. And as time passes, you will appreciate that she did not linger and waste away until you were forced to make that difficult decision. And of course, you will focus on the memories of your time with her and smile at the fun she is having with her old friends over the bridge.

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  41. We are so sad for you. We know how hard it is. Lady Caroline

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  42. I can't stop crying. Oh Kim, I am so sorry once again... for all of you. Honestly, I don't know how you do it. You have a special gift. (((HUG)))

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  43. So so sorry for yet another loss, tears are flowing down. Hugs Francine.

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  44. So very sorry for another loss. Sheba sounds like a wonderful dog and we know she is missed. Hugs.

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Speak--I really enjoy your comments! Thanks for stopping by today!!